“The I want Daddy syndrome”
So I just want to start off by saying I am no expert, but I have been a parent for approximately 165 months now. So I do have some wisdom in this department. Some days I have this parenting thing down pat while other days I like to hide in the bathroom with my coffee while I regroup. So let’s talk a bit about my teenager. He wakes up either on top of the world, or ready to throw hands with the first person that smiles at him. As for my32 month old, she is a pretty much on the same page as the teenager but she can’t actually verbalize it. Yet.
So, I was off work and having a grand day with my toddler.
As I heard the pitter patter of her little feet, I prepared myself for which personality my little one was going to have today. I hear her feet slow and she almost tip toes up to my side of the bed. Mind you, my husband is already off to work and it is now about 7 am. I was thinking, maybe she’s going to crawl into bed and snuggle before falling back to sleep. SoI decided to lay there not moving. If I don’t move, she can’t see me right? Wait that’s a T-rex. Same difference.
It’s then that I feel her warm breath on my face. I hear her inhale slowly. She then proceeds to ever so loudly yells “ROAR, I’m a bear.” So much for sleeping in. I open my sleep filled eyes and say as nicely as I can, Good morning Peanut. The response I get is so sweet and gentle. She looks and me with her big brown eyes and sternly tells me No, I want Daddy. Where’s my daddy? I tell her Daddy is at work and it started a verbal battle .I never thought I would be arguing with a miniature version of myself over her dad being at work, but I like to try new things.
Remember there is going to come a day when your child will not need your help themselves anymore, let alone ask for you like she does as a toddler.
When I am away at work, I often wonder if during the middle of an activity, she yells at my husband “I want mommy” like she does for me. I mean it’s only fair right?So I asked him. He almost rolled his eyes at me. I guess this amazing phrase goes both ways.
He told me that for the most part, she is happy to request daddy to do every single task when I am gone. Until she gets told no. I guess he went to do a simple task for maybe 2 minutes and she had proceeded to climb on top of the table. He described her to be standing on top of the table very proud of herself while saying,”Look Daddy.” Well, Daddy said you can’t stand on the table and kindly requested her to get down. That began the meltdown of the century. She yelled, “no no no I want my mommy.”
She has it down to a science. As the bright age of 2, she is already trying to play us against each other to see who will give in first. My best advice is to work as a team and make a game plan and stick with it. And never, I mean never go against your significant other in front of your child. They will figure it out and you will literally start world war 3. Keep a united front.
On a more serious note, remember that you can research parenting tips, read all the books you can get your hands on and it will not provide you with every scenario. You need to find your way of parenting. And as for the I want mommy or daddy syndrome, It will pass. Don’t get discouraged or feel inadequate. As little ones grow, their little brains are growing and learning too. They mean no harm by these phrases. As they get older, you will look back at all these frustrating times and laugh about them.
Like the time when my oldest was little and he was sick. My husband came downstairs to use the bathroom and low and behold, he was in the carpeted hallway covered in what I can only describe as left over pizza. I heard my husband yell for me. I went downstairs and almost slipped on a piece of sausage. It was defiantly sausage because at that age, that is the only thing he would eat.
I looked in horror at the mess all over him and the carpet. He looked at us and said “I want mommy.”
This article will help you overcome difficult days: 100 Positive Parenting Affirmations